"The Myth of the Perfectly Happy Family" by New Jersey's award-winning family photographer Pamira Bezmen

Family Photos by NJ family photographer Pamira Bezmen PhotographyFamily Photos by NJ family photographer Pamira Bezmen Photography

Those photos that make you smile on Facebook. The ones that give you an envious twirl in your stomach.  The curiosity, the questions that kill...

"Is she always that gorgeous?"

"Look at the way he's holding her hand, with such tenderness... I wish my husband held my hand like that."

"See that perfectly poised little girl. Wish mine would sit still for a minute, and not have crusty crumbs around his nose all the time."

"Ugh, seriously, how can she have all that time to go out that much to all those places?"

Oh how pretty the smiles, warm the hugs, sweet the love, tight the bond...

Of THOSE people. Those impossible people who have come up with the secret to a perfectly happy family.  And here are the photos to prove it.

But how???

Maybe if I had a nanny, or a husband who would just hold my hand a little bit every day. If we went out more often to spark things up. If we had sex more often.  If our kid went to sleep at 7pm every night and picked up her toys, never flooded the kitchen with water at 11pm playing dinosaurs and mermaids.  Or maybe if our families lived closer, or if we had more friends, better friends...

Maybe we made all the wrong choices. Wrong partner, wrong city, wrong life...

Sigh...

As loving and non-jealous a person as I am, I still hear voices like these in my head sometimes.  I don't invite them, but they come. 

Then I pay attention to our own family portraits, what WE post on Facebook, and what our friends say about them.

I realize, WE ARE those impossible people who have the perfect happy family - at least to the outside world.

They generously write loving and kind comments under our photos like:

"Gorgeous family"

"May your happiness last forever"

"What a happy perfect family, looking at you makes me smile"

"You are a ball of warm fuzzy love. Super!"

...Embroidered with countless little smileys and red hearts...

Reading these comments warms my heart.  It also reminds me that this is part of what I do. 

I am in the business of "Creating the Myth of the Perfectly Happy Family" for each of my clients.

Because we all need to know that we belong in a web of perfect, unshakable love - one where we all look gorgeous to one another, and our love is strong.  Nothing in the world can harm us as long as we are in one another's embrace.  All crazy things aside, we are one face and one body when we stand together. We are a family.

Family Photos by NJ family photographer Pamira Bezmen PhotographyFamily Photos by NJ family photographer Pamira Bezmen Photography

I am in the business of creating the Myth of the Perfectly Happy Family.

For ourselves and for our children.

They need to grow up KNOWING for darn sure how their parents adore them, and how when we laugh together, the whole world stops turning.  That we are all gorgeous when we are loved and happy.

Is there a perfect family?  Don't we all have issues, arguments, character flaws, and weaknesses? Don't we all at some point wonder off to alternate dimensions in our imagination where we are in someone else's perfect, happy family photo?  Don't we each wish things were a little like this and a little like that?  At least sometimes in life?

I believe we do.  And I think it's a part of being human.  We all seek happiness and protection.  We are not jealous, but we look up to images of stories that look "complete" with whatever we think we may be missing.  For some of us they may be few, for some others they may be many.

Yes, of course, in the end, happiness comes from within, and no one ends up in anyone else's portrait.  Because if we can't make happiness in our own portrait, we sure can't make it happen in someone else's.  Also there is no such thing as switching places, but that's an obvious limitation of the three-dimensional human existence, at least for the time being.

The truth is that we all have the perfect family.  Perfect happiness is in each kitchen, playroom, bath time, and bed-time story.  It runs in the woods, plays in muddy puddles, and eats chestnuts snuggling on the couch. 

It refuses to brush teeth and cries over the color of socks.  It throws a tantrum for being late to work and then demands tacos for dinner.  It spends too much money on something no one else cares for.  It wants to be thinner, taller, blonder, tanner.  It drinks wine and cries over The Sound of Music and it complains that everything is out of control.  It fantasizes over superheroes and ex-lovers then falls in love with a hand-made heart made of play dough.

The perfect family is a messy one.  It comes with under-eye circles from lack of sleep, arguments, crayon drawings on the walls, and tears.

We are human, and it is all in one.

However, what we seek to confirm, remind, and remember forever is the perfection - and the perfection lies in the HAPPINESS - of the family.

Family Photos by NJ family photographer Pamira Bezmen PhotographyFamily Photos by NJ family photographer Pamira Bezmen Photography

I know you all have plenty of photos on your iPhones of your messy walls, chocolate covered mouths, and breakfasts in sweat pants.  The lovely mess that we can't be without. 

I am in the business of creating and helping perpetuate the myth of the perfectly happy family.

I am so glad I am able to do it for my own little imperfect, messy family.  Because there is so much love in here that it has to be documented, glorified, polished, framed, and hung on our Facebook walls and at home.

This myth will give my daughter the self confidence to go out to the world, knowing that she has everything she needs to do whatever her big heart desires.  I got this torch of unconditional love from my own parents, with a rock solid belief that I grew up in the most perfect, happy family.  I intend to pass it on to my own little one, so she can enjoy the treasure I enjoyed.

I am in the business of helping you write and tell your own myth. To your children and grandchildren.

The myth of the perfectly happy family. 

Only it's not a myth.  It is merely what we all have.  Just not 100% of the time.

Love,

- Pamira

Family Photos by NJ family photographer Pamira Bezmen PhotographyFamily Photos by NJ family photographer Pamira Bezmen Photography

Holiday Blessings & Love from Pamira Bezmen Photography & Family

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May all your celebrations be merry & your loved ones always near.

May your hearts fill with peace & joy

and your new year bring blessings & love.

- Pamira, Shawn, Shaya & Troy

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Studio Schedule for December and January:

(English)

I will be in Istanbul, Turkey for the month of January, and the Verona studio will be closed until Jan/25.

My clients who wish to contact me for orders, or for scheduling appointments can contact me via e-mail. My phone and voicemail may not work when overseas, but I will respond to my e-mails when I have reliable internet service.


VERONA, NJ:
Closed December 24-26
Open December 27-28
Closed December 29 - January 25
Open January 25

ISTANBUL, Turkey:
Open for sessions from January 3 to January 20 in Bebek, Istanbul.
All ordering sessions will be done at the time of session date, and print products will be shipped directly to your homes by courier.

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(Turkce)

* Sevgili Istanbullu Dostlarim,

3 Ocak - 20 Ocak tarihleri arasi Bebek'teki home studio'mda kisitli bir miktar fotograf seansi yapiyor olacagim.

Tum ilgilenen dostlarimin onceden tarihlerini ve paketlerini konfirme etmelerini rica ediyorum.

Ilgilendiginiz baski urunlerini ve Kolleksiyonlarinizi da seansi yaptigimiz gun kararlastirarak profesyonel baski urunlerinizi kurye ile evlerinize postalatacagim.
Guzel resimlerinizin bir an evvel kahve sehpalarinizi ve duvarlarinizi suslemelerini istiyorum.

Yakinda gorusmek uzere, hepinizi sevgiyle kucakliyorum...

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The Cold Never Bothered Her Anyway | on Honesty with "My little Elsa" 

by award-winning NJ family photographer Pamira Bezmen, of Pamira Bezmen Photography

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2014 has been the year of "Elsa"s. 

Little girls everywhere embraced this northern queen with her faults, and they found warmth in her magical snow storms.  They all sang "Let it Go" at the top of their lungs and off key (because I don't think it's possible for the general public to sing this song any other way), and they all slammed bathroom and kitchen doors behind their backs concluding "The cold never bothered me anyway!"

Setting aside the magic and love interests, in the end what I find magical about this well done Disney animation movie is that it is one of the few movies where the heroin does not need a man of power to save her, free her, or revive her.  In the end, true love between two sisters is what saves them both and the world around them.  What saves Anna from her own freezing death is her own "act of true love" and selfless sacrifice.  What saves Elsa from her fear is seeing how much her sister loves her despite it all.

I think there is even a bigger moral in the story, however.  When you go back to the beginning of the movie, you notice when Elsa's magic turns into a curse: When her overprotective parents try to conceal the truth in a fruitless effort to protect their daughters.

The magic and the excitement is replaced with lies and fear. Fear takes over Elsa's life. She shuts everything and everyone out. She shuts love out of her own heart out of fear.

The parents' ignorant lie causes one daughter to live in fear and confinement for years while the other one finds herself abandoned by her sister and best-friend, never understanding why, living her childhood and teenage years in lonely sadness.

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Isn't that the cold truth about every unkind person you've met?  Every mean person is a scared and broken spirit inside.

This is a great lesson for all of us parents, I believe.
Let's not lie to our children - about anything at all. Giving them the freedom of truth is the first step in enabling them to deal with their strengths as well as their short-comings.

Love beats hate every day.  Honesty beats fear every day.

Even in the face of sad news or difficult topics, I believe that children are perfectly equipped to deal with all sorts of concepts and facts, when they are delivered in honesty and accompanied by loving support. 

They become smarter in every way when they know they can unconditionally trust that we will give them the honest truth on every topic.  They ask more questions, they think more critically, they also hold us and themselves accountable for honesty as a general principle.

I think it would be ridiculous for me to tell my daughter lies - even white ones - and then get mad at her when she lies about how many pieces of chocolate she ate under the table or whether she brushed her teeth.  To me, they are all the same thing: Storks bringing babies, "Santa"s climbing through chimneys, how many chocolates one ate under the table, and whether a friend offered her drugs after school.

If the concept is permissible to one, then it's permissible to all. The principle is the same. Lying is either allowed or it's not.  And if it's not, I should not be showcasing it as her role model.

I am determined to not tell a single lie to my daughter. I cannot think of a single lie to tell that would be worth shaking her confidence in me. I do not ever want to see the disappointment in her eyes that I once told her otherwise.

Out of respect and love for her and with the hope that showcasing full honesty will lead to a self-monitoring person with an honest conscience, who also trusts me enough to come to me about any and every topic she needs help with, without fear, at any age.  And it starts right here, in childhood.

Here's to all our "Elsa"s, "Anna"s, "Cristoff"s and "Hans"s...  and here's to us - being as honest and loving in our parenting as we possibly can be, so that our children can build ice castles and not snow storms.

The cold never bothered them anyway!

Love,

-Pamira

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Hanukkah Message from Pamira Bezmen Photography | NJ family photographer

Hanukkah Greetings from Pamira Bezmen Photography, award winning family and child photographer, New JerseyHanukkah Greetings from Pamira Bezmen Photography, award winning family and child photographer, New Jersey

May your Hanukkah be Happy & Bright and your New Year full of Blessings & Love...

- Pamira, Shawn & Shaya

Pamira Bezmen Photography

2014

Dance on This! Canvas Gallery Wrap Product Review | Award-Winning NJ Family Photographer Pamira Bezmen Photography

Verona, New Jersey

Highest Quality Canvas Gallery Wraps from Pamira Bezmen Photography, award-winning family photographer, Verona New JerseyHighest Quality Canvas Gallery Wraps from Pamira Bezmen Photography, award-winning family photographer, Verona New Jersey

What are the most popular professional print products, once you have had your gallery presented to you?

Is the investment worth it?

Let me try to shed some light on some of the most common questions.

In my studio, lay-flat heirloom albums and canvas gallery wraps are the 2 most popular items that almost ALL my clients ask for.

(I will study the heirloom album in a separate blog post, but focus on the canvas gallery wrap for today.)

In this blog post, I will cover why the canvas gallery wrap is so popular AND, what to look for in your canvas gallery wrap (even if I'm not your photographer).

WHY IS THE CANVAS GALLERY WRAP A GREAT INVESTMENT CHOICE? Canvas Wrap 1

- It is sturdy

- It has beautiful texture that creates depth and adds a 3-dimensional feel to your images

- It can be wiped clean

- It is versatile for hanging, leaning against a wall, or for displaying on an easel

- It will last a long time

- It is resistant to the elements (unlike paper)

- It can be framed for a more classic look or hung as is for a more modern feel

- It does not have any glass, which means it's not fragile (and hence safer around kids)

ARE ALL CANVAS GALLERY WRAPS CREATED EQUAL?

Nope.

Due to the popularity of the canvas gallery wrap, you will find many providers, most of which offer low quality products at what initially looks like an inexpensive (and hence attractive) option for many consumers - UNTIL your canvas sags, frame warps, corners give, and your baby's face starts looking wrinkled and your chest drops to your stomach.

Not to mention the fact that color calibration and cropping is usually off, and sharpness is optional.

Not the wall art you want to show off at your holiday party year after year - or gift to your child in 12 years, proudly saying:

"Here, son, this is our family heirloom.  Now it's all yours. Here is what we all looked like when you were born...  Hmmm, only a bit warped, and saggy.. and soggy...  And your face was not that blurry and your mom's eyes did not look so glazed.  She had pretty eyes, actually..."

You get my point.  Don't let this be your story.

Canvas wraps 2

 WHAT TO LOOK FOR IN A PROFESSIONAL QUALITY CANVAS GALLERY WRAP?

- The frame should be of highest quality wood that will not warp or tilt

- If possible, the canvas should be stretched over a solid block of wood for added durability and stability, as well as providing a solid foundation for your canvas

- The corners should be tight - and I mean TIGHT - no bulging or visible pockets in the corners

- The back should be closed up and finished professionally

- It should be finished with a hanging device that is professionally applied, which is even and centered

- The canvas should be covered with a protective layer (matte, semi-glossy or glossy laminate), per your taste

- The colors should be spot on

- Skin colors should not be off, yellowish, greenish, reddish, muddy, or blotchy

- The image should be as sharp as your photographer presented to you on the screen - no blur or pixellation should be introduced during the printing process

- Lastly, it should come with a warranty - if the quality is not to your satisfaction (for legitimate reasons), you should be able to have it replaced at no additional cost to you.

All of that is why high quality professional canvas gallery wraps are not $75.  They cannot be.  Unless we're going for indentured servitude.

Just like for every other product, responsibly sourced high quality materials put together by qualified, fairly compensated professionals cannot be cheap.

Here is a series of photos of one my canvas gallery wraps - yes, it is my daughter DANCING ON IT!  Imagine river dance. Toddler version. Music. Stomping. Joy.

Am I worried?  Heck no!

Am I going to tell her to stop?  Nope.

This is the quality product you get when you order a canvas gallery wrap from Pamira Bezmen Photography.

Canvas Dance stitch

I search high and low, near and far to bring the highest quality print products to my clients. 

Your photographic investment is too valuable to waste on cheap prints.

And this is one of the reasons I will not give you high resolution files until after you've already gotten a good number of gorgeous print products from me.

I don't want you to spend your print allowance on a dozen 4x6" prints and then go to the nearest discount store to get a $75 canvas warp  wrap that will disappoint you, for sure.  Even if you think your eye is not trained to see the difference between the good one and the bad one, I'm pretty sure that if you saw them side by side, you could tell the difference.  If I let you walk away with crappy products, then I have not served you right.  Then you might have as well gotten your photos taken at Picture People. 

You know, you can't buy a Corvette and fill'er up with coal.  Nope, I will not let you do it.  You should not let yourself do it, either.

Demand your photographer to give you the highest quality print products. Expect more.  Get the best. 

Don't keep asking your photographer for high resolution files so you can get yourself sub-par prints from the drugstore.  Instead, ask your photographer to give you such gorgeous print products that you will never ever want to touch a digital file ever again.

Then you can let your baby dance on your canvas gallery wraps.

The only question that remains for you is:

What song?

Shaya hugging canvas, DSC_0768 edit

Love,

- Pamira

Holiday Photos of sweet Maximus (4 months old) by New Jersey Family Photographer Pamira Bezmen Photography

Family Holiday Photos by New Jersey's Award Winning Family Photographer Pamira Bezmen Photography

www.pamirabezmenphotography.com

Family Holiday Photos by New Jersey's Award Winning Family Photographer Pamira Bezmen Photography. www.pamirabezmenphotography.comFamily Holiday Photos by New Jersey's Award Winning Family Photographer Pamira Bezmen Photography. www.pamirabezmenphotography.com

Oh my, oh my... I met this little man before he was born, in his sweet mama's belly. And he was already as lovely as he could be - in the shape of a perfect little bump!

And then, that little perfect bump was a perfect little newborn angel.  He was only 4 days old when I photographed him at his home.  It took me only a second to fall in love with him.

Here we are, taking holiday photos, and Maximus is 4 months old already.  It is lovely seeing him growing up so adorably, and more importantly, having the chance and honor to document the love in his family home.  (Thank you, dear Ashli and Michael for continuing to trust me time and again with your memories!)

I do most of my sessions at my studio in Verona (NJ) or in nature, but when we hold a session at a client's home, it is very special.  Maximus's Mommy is surely an avid photography consumer, who not only appreciates the value of professional photography, but also wants to use photography to document precious times and leave Maximus the legacy of his beautiful childhood in the highest quality possible.  His Daddy is a sweetheart, who takes time out of his busy schedule every time we schedule a session.  I can tell he is not loving the camera that much, but he is always so generous making himself available to document these memories for his son.

I can't share all the amazing photos from the session because I don't want to ruin the surprise all together, but here are a few images from Maximus's first holiday gallery, at his family home, with his lovely mom and dad.

Now my only regret is that his Grandma and Great-Grandma were also there when I arrived, but I could not convince them to be in any of the photos (insert triple sad face here). 

- Next time, Ladies, I will not let you get away! :)

Merry Christmas, Maximus! I am loving you as a bump, as an elephant, and as an elf.  But most of all, I am loving you as yourself! <3

Love,

-Pamira

Family Holiday Photos by New Jersey's Award Winning Family Photographer Pamira Bezmen Photography. www.pamirabezmenphotography.comFamily Holiday Photos by New Jersey's Award Winning Family Photographer Pamira Bezmen Photography. www.pamirabezmenphotography.com

Family Holiday Photos by New Jersey's Award Winning Family Photographer Pamira Bezmen Photography. www.pamirabezmenphotography.comFamily Holiday Photos by New Jersey's Award Winning Family Photographer Pamira Bezmen Photography. www.pamirabezmenphotography.com

Family Holiday Photos by New Jersey's Award Winning Family Photographer Pamira Bezmen Photography. www.pamirabezmenphotography.comFamily Holiday Photos by New Jersey's Award Winning Family Photographer Pamira Bezmen Photography. www.pamirabezmenphotography.com

You Give Me a Reason | Happy Thanksgiving from Pamira Bezmen Photography

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You Give me a Reason...

- to wash my hair more often and change into nicer looking clothes

- to roll all over the ground, climb onto logs and ladders, and to crawl into bushes to capture that one sweet expression

- to step into mud, water and slush to get that perfect pose by the duck pond

- to wake up with a passion at 3am to work on your gallery

- to keep pushing myself and my vendors to bring to you the best images and heirloom print products possible

- to keep learning and growing and falling in love...

THANK YOU ALL!

I am deeply and sincerely thankful for your friendship, patronage and trust. 

I could not think of a bigger and more important responsibility than the creation of your family heirlooms, capturing of your precious moments, and the documentation of the love and connection in your family.

• Thank you for trusting me.
• Thank you for letting me be a part of your journey.
• Thank you for referring me to your loved ones.
• Thank you for continuing to come back to me, year after year.

Have a very happy, healthy, and joyful Thanksgiving with your loved ones.

Love,

-Pamira & Shawn & Shaya

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No Black Friday or Cyber Monday here!

You will not be receiving any marketing, sales, coupons, or specials from Pamira Bezmen Photography this week.

I want you to enjoy your family in peace without any commercial interruptions.
As always, when you are ready to book your next session or to order lovely wall art and great quality prints and heirloom albums, you know where to find me ;-)

Vincent Michael Olivo

born November 10, 2014.  11:15am.  6lbs. 13oz. 19 3/4in.

Newborn Angel, 6 days old

November 16, 2014

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He kept us waiting and waiting, but even as just his photographer, I can say it was worth every second.

I am always humbled with the responsibility of capturing this precious time, and doing it justice,

as well as overjoyed with the opportunity to make art of a once in a lifetime occasion.

I can think of no better art to hang on my walls, no prettier face to stare at each morning than one of my own baby,

and I believe it is the same for each family.

Nothing can sooner make me realize the importance of why, what and who I am,

and nothing can better ground me than motherhood.

Nothing can bring forgiveness and joy faster into my heart,

and nothing can improve me more drastically as a human being than the necessity brought by parenthood.

Vincent, sweet little baby love,

Your every little finger,

every tiny cracked nail,

every breath, and every look

is precious beyond all things combined.

Within that little body, you embody all love, kindness, peace and greatness

that can become of a human.

You bring with you light,

and we look to you to make the world a better place,

along with all other babies,

some day...

Be everything that you can be, and show us the way.

Much love,

- Pamira

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Copyright Pamira Bezmen, 2014

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Happy Halloween | Be a Hero to Children in Need | Coat Drive for Children | NJ Family and Child Photographer Pamira Bezmen Photography

2014, 2x3.5 Halloween Card - 800x533Halloween Photos by New Jersey Family and Child Photographer Pamira Bezmen Photography

Be safe and enjoy this day with your precious little ones!

I am thankful that we are able to enjoy this fun holiday with our children, in peace and warmth.  Unfortunately, many children around the world are not as fortunate as we are.

A child's suffering has no nationality, religion, race, or language. Just the feeling of pain, hunger, and cold.  All children belong to all of us.

This week, I donated to two organizations that help children.  I will share the information of one of them with you so that you may consider doing the same, if you have some resources to spare...

Love,

- Pamira

Be a Hero this holiday and make a donation to the many children who are without homes, coats or clothes in Gaza.

The Palestine Children's Relief Fund is organized by Humanity for Palestine. All the money will go towards helping innocent children in need.

Please click here for details and how you can help.

Humanity for Palestine is a community of diverse individuals, consisting of all religious, national and ethnic backgrounds.  It is not for profit. It was recently founded by a remarkable man, an inspirational, kind and loving person, my friend Peter Cohen.  He is dedicating his personal time and resources to educating people on all sides of the Middle Eastern conflict, inviting people to rise above government and corporate propaganda and put love and compassion above all else.  His goal is to help create a community of human beings, living in love and peace.

You can follow them on facebook at Humanity for Palestine page.

Complimentary Portrait Session Time to Have some fun! - A COMPETITION from NJ Family Photographer Pamira Bezmen Photography

DSC_3880.2New Jersey newborn, baby, family photographer Pamira Bezmen Photography. Your precious moments. captured. www.pamirabezmenphotography.com

Dear Friends & Fans,

To celebrate my recent PPA award, I would love to give a Complimentary Session to one winner at my Verona, NJ studio.
(maternity, newborn or family session, your choice)

In order to participate, I ask you to do 3 things:

1. Sign up for my newsletter at this link
 

2. Like my facebook page @ Pamira Bezmen Photography

3. Share this page on your facebook page and tag me @ Pamira Bezmen Photography

you can copy and paste this link from here:

http://pamirabezmenphotography.us3.list-manage.com/subscribe?u=bf69fe8e6803d9a5356d37a41&id=39022640ae

 

Feel free to share with friends and family. Share the fun!

Good Luck! Thanks for playing!

- Pamira

- Winner will be announced by November 15th, 2014

- Gift includes session only, and is not applicable to professional print products or digital files

- Winner will be eligible to have access to all services and product selections as regular clients

to see my work, you can click on the Gallery link above and browse the different galleries.  Enjoy!

Cumhuriyet Bayrami'miz Kutlu Olsun!  Daha nice, nice seneler bunu soylemek nasip olsun.

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Temiz, isikli, dogru, durust yollardan yurumeye devam edebilecegimiz,
Cocuklarimizi baris, medeniyet, insaniyet icinde buyutebilecegimiz "yarin"lara insallah...

Isiklar icinde yat, canim Ata'm.
Hersey icin sag ol!!!  Seni hic unutmadik, hic unutmayacagiz.  Cok derinden seviyoruz.

- Pamira

The Angel is in the Details | NJ Family Photographer Pamira Bezmen

Newborn details, macro, baby hands, feet, eyelashes, lips. Newborn Photography. New Jersey Family Photographer, Newborn Photographer Pamira Bezmen.

They say "The Devil is in the details", and it probably is true, but I've noticed that the Angel is also in the details.

Even at the age of 3, I watch my daughter sleeping. I just lie next to her and I get as close as I can. 

I watch her breathing. I study every little detail on her face: 

The tiny little nose, the long eyelashes, the pout, the little fingers, toes, and nails...

Every little detail is perfect.

Created with care and wisdom.

DSC_3071Newborn details, macro, baby hands, feet, eyelashes, lips. Newborn Photography. New Jersey Family Photographer, Newborn Photographer Pamira Bezmen.

DSC_3075Newborn details, macro, baby hands, feet, eyelashes, lips. Newborn Photography. New Jersey Family Photographer, Newborn Photographer Pamira Bezmen.

DSC_3088Newborn details, macro, baby hands, feet, eyelashes, lips. Newborn Photography. New Jersey Family Photographer, Newborn Photographer Pamira Bezmen.

DSC_3078Newborn details, macro, baby hands, feet, eyelashes, lips. Newborn Photography. New Jersey Family Photographer, Newborn Photographer Pamira Bezmen.

You cannot look at the little details on a newborn and not fall in love with them.  You cannot not notice the perfection, the beauty, and the function.  Newborn details, macro, baby hands, feet, eyelashes, lips. Newborn Photography. New Jersey Family Photographer, Newborn Photographer Pamira Bezmen.

You cannot not take your hat off and bow down in awe and amazement.

If you are a believer, you will believe deeper.  If you are not a believer, you may just end up believing after noticing these details.

Each one is a tiny little replica of what it's supposed to one day grow into, and fully functional, too.

I am convinced, the Angel is in the details... Of our little ones.

That's why I now include a close-up study of your precious baby in each newborn session. 1739Newborn details, macro, baby hands, feet, eyelashes, lips. Newborn Photography. New Jersey Family Photographer, Newborn Photographer Pamira Bezmen.

So that when those hands are big enough to help you carry the grocery bags, when those feet are large enough to run and jump, you can still remember, just a while back, how small, fragile and delicate they were.  How sweet they smelled.  How you sat there staring at them for hours without getting bored.

So that you can continue to be reminded of the miracle and gift of this angel who was placed in your arms and life.

The Angel is in the details, and the details are in the Angel...

Go ahead. Take an hour. Leave your phone charging. Turn off your laptop and tablet. Just sit there, stare and fall in love...

Love,

- Pamira

1793 copyNewborn details, macro, baby hands, feet, eyelashes, lips. Newborn Photography. New Jersey Family Photographer, Newborn Photographer Pamira Bezmen.

The Light in Me Sees the Light in You |  Visiting Day at For The Animals Sanctuary in Blairstown, NJ

story and photographs by New Jersey Family Photographer Pamira Bezmen Photography

October, 12, 2014

Mom and baby petting rescued goat Henry at For the Animals Sanctuary, Blairstown, NJ. Compassionate living. Family Photographer Pamira Bezmen Photography.

If you are like me and many others raised in the Western culture, you probably grew up eating meat. It was always "eat your protein", "eat your meat", "drink your milk".

Even when I got hard core into working out and "living healthy", I consumed a lot of dairy and meat for protein.

DSC_5122Mom and baby petting rescued Cow Amy at For the Animals Sanctuary, Blairstown, NJ. Compassionate living. Family Photographer Pamira Bezmen Photography. Now this is not me talking from a higher place, nor am I trying to convert anyone to veganism, but in the past couple of years, I've been having a hard time digesting all that goes on in dairy farms and factory farms to raise the "food" we are so accustomed to consuming out of a package.

A ton of studies and data suggest the harmful health effects of consuming dairy and meat, in addition to many environmental and scientific concerns such as carbon footprint, waste, climate change, soil erosion, greenhouse gases, overgrazed pastures, water shortages, contamination in our water sources, inefficient use of fossil energy, the hundreds of millions of people we could not feed with that grain given to farm animals, etc, etc, etc... the list goes on and on...  - on none of which I am an expert - that state that modern society has come to a point of consuming way too much of these "foods", at a very high cost to the earth, other species, and the future of our children. 

While talking about poverty and famine, we often forget that a huge portion of usable land in the United States is occupied to grow food for the factory farmed animals, and more than half the grain grown is fed to farm animals.

I don't know about you, but I can't help wonder:

"What if we used all that beautiful bountiful soil to grow healthy, wholesome fruits, veggies, and legumes full of vitamins, minerals, useful phytochemicals, protein, shining in all gorgeous colors of the rainbow, and we fed the people of the world with it - instead of growing a bizillion tons of GMO-corn to feed cows, pigs and chickens, which will cause them to live miserable lives on antibiotics?"

(until they are slaughtered, of course, and then we eat them and ingest the antibiotics that cause super bugs that are impossible to kill)

All that aside, the ethical concern about how these farm animals are treated is probably the most tangible and immediate issue for me.  It does not matter so much to me any more whether or not humans are meant to be omnivores and cave-men hunted bison for food, or if cows are bred for human consumption and otherwise would not have existed in the first place, or if we truly need our protein to come from an animal source, blah blah blah, and many other reasons and excuses we may find to continue consuming animals...

The issue is this: If a creature is capable of feeling pain, do I have the right to hurt it?

DSC_5076Family Visit to For The Animals Sanctuary. Compassionate living. Photos by Pamira Bezmen Photography, New Jersey Family Photographer. When I find a dog, do I kick him?

When I find a cat, do I jam her into a cage so tight she can't even turn around or stand up, and have her live there all her life having baby after baby until she is so spent that I cut her and eat her?

When I find a beautiful horse, do I take her baby, kill it (and eat it) and then hook machines to the horse's teets to take her milk while she cries and cries after her stolen baby for weeks?

No.

Why would I do it to a cow, pig, goat or sheep?

I wouldn't.

And if I don't have the heart (or the stomach) to do any of this, why would I give money to someone else to do it for me?

I shouldn't.

But because old habits are hard to change, our journey is long.  We are eliminating one thing at a time. And trust me, once it's out, we realize we didn't need it so much.  We eat almost all organic, unprocessed, wholesome foods, take no medication, and almost never get sick.

Last weekend we went to visit For The Animals Sanctuary in Blairstown, New Jersey.

For The Animals Sanctuary is a not-for-profit organization that is dedicated to providing a safe haven and life-long veterinary care to rescued farm DSC_5217For the Animals Sanctuary, Blairstown, NJ. Compassionate living. Family Photographer Pamira Bezmen Photography. animals.  We drove about an hour from Verona and our baby fell asleep just as we were pulling in.  The weather was gorgeous, but we were stuck with a sleeping baby. What to do?

We gave our donations to the very sweet 10 year old girl who greeted us and put kitty cat stamps on our hands :)  Later we learned that her name was M.J. and she "volunteered" at the Sanctuary.  When I heard this, I wanted to weep in joy and love.  This little girl, who is so young, found it in her heart to "volunteer" at a sanctuary. 

I asked her what she did as a volunteer.  I must be honest, I expected her answer to be about some feel-good small task that did not add up to much.  I was doubly impressed when she said "I mostly clean poop."

I wanted to hug and kiss and love this girl, and thank her mama for raising such a wonderful human being.  We all have so much to learn from M.J. and her mom!

We laid our baby on a blanket under a tree and enjoyed the scenery for the next hour.  She slept in peace in the soft fall breeze while my fiancee and I basked in the sweet sun. 

We watched other visitors and volunteers go about. We didn't know anyone but everyone gave us a kind smile, a gentle head nod.  It was an unspoken agreement of some sorts. It meant:

"I see the light in you, and I salute the kindness in your heart, from the bottom of my own heart."

We were all there to support this organization and the people who dedicated their lives to helping save animals from torture, sickness, sadness, pain and eventually - unavoidably - a bloody and painful slaughter.

Family Visit to For The Animals Sanctuary. Compassionate living. Photos by Pamira Bezmen Photography, New Jersey Family Photographer. A bit later, we heard the sweet voices of some of our dear friends who were also there for the same purpose. My daughter woke up when she heard her dear friend Leela's cheerful voice, and we spent the rest of our day at the Sanctuary. 

We listened to the stories of each of the animals, how they ended up at the Sanctuary, their personalities. I wept a little when Tami, also a volunteer and M.J.'s mom, told me about how Grace the cow ended up at the Sanctuary with her newborn calf after 2 of her previous babies were taken away from her to be slaughtered for veal. - Remember the taste of that Veal Milanese?  It's someone's newborn baby! :(

We experienced their individuality as we talked to them, petted them and fed them.  The kids ran around in the sun, up and down the hill, rolling in the grass with joy.  We shared our food with one another and the animals.

Our Sunday at the Sanctuary was a wonderful experience. There was a deep sense of calm and completeness that came from loving, not killing. The vegan food we shared with friends on the blanket tasted better than any bar-be-que I can imagine.  The taste of compassion. The taste of love. The taste of giving up something in order to respect and protect another.

This, I feel, is what I want to teach my child.  Love for One. Love for All.

With special and deep thanks to all my vegan friends who have compassionately shown us a better, kinder way of living. With special thanks and gratitude to all people who have dedicated their lives to saving, protecting, and loving animals, and taking on the sometimes impossible challenge of educating a society of the facts and alternatives.

And a very deep and humble Thank You and I'm Sorry to all the animals who have had to suffer and give up their lives to provide us with food.

The light in me sees the light in you.  My heart is one with yours. My soul is a sister to yours. 

- Pamira

DSC_5382Visiting Day at For the Animals Sanctuary. Compassionate Living. New Jersey Family Photographer Pamira Bezmen Photography.

DSC_5251Family Visit to For The Animals Sanctuary. Compassionate living. Photos by Pamira Bezmen Photography, New Jersey Family Photographer.	DSC_5180Family Visit to For The Animals Sanctuary. Compassionate living. Photos by Pamira Bezmen Photography, New Jersey Family Photographer.
DSC_5238Family Visit to For The Animals Sanctuary. Compassionate living. Photos by Pamira Bezmen Photography, New Jersey Family Photographer.	DSC_5291Family Visit to For The Animals Sanctuary. Compassionate living. Photos by Pamira Bezmen Photography, New Jersey Family Photographer.
DSC_5331Family Visit to For The Animals Sanctuary. Compassionate living. Photos by Pamira Bezmen Photography, New Jersey Family Photographer.	DSC_5265Family Visit to For The Animals Sanctuary. Compassionate living. Photos by Pamira Bezmen Photography, New Jersey Family Photographer.

You can visit For The Animals Sanctuary on their web site or follow them on their For The Animals facebook page.